Pin the Penis

They aren’t original or complicated, but the bachelorette variations of Pin the Tail on the Donkey will get everyone laughing and having fun. Why? Because male emasculation is inherently humorous, especially to women. The journey from single man to husband requires the healing ministrations of a woman who has a jar all prepared to hold those pesky genitals until those rare occasions when they’re needed.

Which are the best “pin the tail” games for bachelorette parties? Here are our picks, ranked from best to not so best.

Pin The Macho On The Man

You know how the game is played. A player is blindfolded and spun around until dizzy. Then she walks toward the target, using her “friends’” catcalls for directions. In her hand she holds a paper cutout of a cartoon penis with a thumbtack stuck through it. 
When she thinks she’s near, she takes a stab at the target and pins the penis to a photo of a naked man with a bullseye crotch. Then she removes her blindfold to see how close she got.

The game includes the Macho Man poster, 24 by 36 inches, and 25 playing pieces to pin. The Macho Man is a good-looking, young guy who sort of looks like Adam Sandler.
The playing pieces come in different cartoon penile shapes including trout, candle, golf club, vibrator, bacon & eggs, vibrator and peni in all sizes and colors. All of these pieces must be cut out of a coated paper sheet before the game can be played.
One of the funner aspects of Pin the Macho is that many pieces have little sayings and a place to write the player’s name. For example, “Here’s one for ____. A big family she’s got. If she had any sense, he’d be tied in a knot.”

Except for the tape, pins and blindfold that you supply, Pin the Macho on the Man has everything required for a bachelorette party game.

Pin the Junk on the Hunk

This version is very similar to Pin the Macho. One advantage, though, is that the 15 cartoon penis pieces are almost ready for play right out of the box. Just pop them out of light cardboard sheets. No cutting required. Shapes include snake, nuts & bolt, fire hose, bat & balls, hot dog & condiments, champagne & glasses, and penises. No funny sayings are printed on the pieces. 

The 24- by 36-inch color poster features a twenty-something guy who could use a shave and some manscaping, but is otherwise presentable for this occasion. All you need to supply is a blindfold and pins.